Sometimes we are so wrapped up in our problems and trying to fix them ourselves that we don’t think of counselling as an option. I have a patient. He has been intermittently going to therapy since he was thirteen, and now he is nineteen. He chose different counsellors, therapists, or psychologists every year until he finally settled on the right one after five years. And now comes for sessions with me with regularity. He recognized when he needed therapy but realized late that he needed it consistently.

Let’s focus on these two cases before discussing the timing of counselling or therapy. There is a couple that I counsel. They are in an abusive relationship where the man has attempted to harm the woman multiple times physically and, in her own words, has once tried to choke her neck. Despite all this, she says she still wants to be with him. They started therapy late, already trapped in their abusive patterns. And they refused to acknowledge the importance of their counsellor’s interventions. The male patient declined to recognize the need for consistency and regularity in treatment, which resulted prolong distress and the creation of further problems that he was not equipped to handle. The couple refused to take advice from their counsellor, resulting in further entrapment in their abusive relationship.

Now, let’s talk about timing. The male patient had been afflicted with certain mental illnesses, the resolution of which depended on a heavy amount of counselling. By refusing to access this resolution regularly, he further worsened his condition by being inactive. The right time for him to take to regular therapy would have been when he first recognized that he had issues that he couldn’t resolve by himself. This would have enabled him to learn how to deal with them and how to handle how he felt by using healthy therapeutic methods.

The couple should have resorted to relationship counselling on the first instance that either perceived that they harboured negative feelings for each other. It is not always apparent when to choose therapy as an option. Humans are autonomous creatures by nature and try not to ask for help. The concept of using counselling as asking for help should not be used. Counselling is, in fact, exactly like going to the doctor. Instead of fixing physical ailments, it is going to the doctor to select the ones in your mind. Negativity, Anger, Hatred, Overwhelming Sadness, and Persisting issues that you can’t figure out on your own.

When experiencing any distress, the best thing to do is to ask yourself why you feel that way. Then ask yourself, “Can I fix this on my own?” If the answer is no, then you should consult a professional in the field of mental healthcare. It can be a Counsellor, Psychologist or Psychiatrist. These professionals, such as I, have been trained to answer your questions about yourself that you can’t. Take some time to understand your patterns and introspect on your emotions. Understand why you behave the way you do. Counselling/Therapy is a time taking process, but it is worth it.

If you are lost or have no answers, then the best is to partake in Therapy or Counselling or visit a Psychologist. If you cannot understand why things are happening the way they are and you feel immensely overwhelmed, see for counselling or therapy to a Psychologist or Psychiatrist. Psychiatrists or Psychologists have been trained for years to understand behaviour. They must have done intensive training in the same when you feel negative emotions for an extended period that you think you have no control over, therapy or counselling will be a ray of hope in the darkness.

Dr Nisha Khanna, a leading Mental Healthcare Professional, Counsellor and Psychologist, proffer online, telephonically and face-to-face Counselling Services in Delhi. Suppose you live in Delhi, India or any other part of the World. In that case, you can approach us online (Via audio or Video Calls) and offline (in the clinic) mediums for any issues related to Personal, Love, Relationship, Post-Marriage, Family, Stress, Anxiety, Emotions, Behaviour, Personality, Abuse and so on. For further details, visit Bye Tense, or call us at +91-9818211474