Every man, after marriage, expects his wife to behave in a way which makes him feel loved and supported. Most of the time, it is assumed that sexual intimacy is most important for men, but men also require emotional intimacy. They try to be strong and, many times, try to conceal their true feelings. It is noteworthy to understand various things that your man might need:
- Understanding
They want their wife to be considerate. The prominent problem men face a striking balance between work and family. They are often in a dilemma of giving their work more incredible time or their wife. It becomes vital for the wife to ensure that their husband feels they get them. Women need to understand that men tend to function primarily by logic, and understanding this difference and appreciating their quality can be very helpful. Women may feel that their husbands are always busy with their work; every man feels that since they are working and earning for their family, nagging about how they have no time for the family makes them frustrated and irritated.
- Intimacy
It’s no revelation that sex is essential to men. However, men will admit that it’s number one on the list, but men also have emotional needs. The fact is not that men are not dynamic, but the problem is that they are not very vocal about their feelings. Thus sexual intimacy is how women can connect and be close to their husbands. When the wife often expects emotional support from their husband, it is essential to understand that not all men are attuned to the art of listening. They also many times show their love in a variety of non-verbal forms. Example: Women should learn how to appreciate the small efforts made by their husbands. Focus on these small efforts that he makes. Consider if you’re not in a good mood, but rather than listening, your husband gets you your favourite food to support you.
- Appreciation
Everyone likes to be appreciated for their efforts, and men are no exception. When you compliment your husband, it boosts his confidence. Men are conditioned to constantly worry about how they perform their duties at work/home and whether or not they are being able to cater to the needs of their families. However, when the wife tends to provide positive affirmations, it doesn’t only help them deal with pressure but makes them feel good about themselves. This, in turn, increases their self-efficacy and self-esteem. Example: If you have a financial problem, rather than complaining about it and taunting him, you can support him by not cribbing about things you don’t have or drawing comparisons.
- Communication
Most men tend to get into their cave when they are stressed. But they also like when their wife creates an atmosphere where they can have their space and come back and talk when they feel like it. Women need to understand that men are used to solving problems and will initially try to deal with the problem independently. Men always prefer women who are direct with them rather than saying things in a cynical and manipulative manner; they like to say things out loud that you expect from them. Example: While communicating, women should not mock and compliment their husbands on their positive traits.
- Support and Respect
To build a stronger relationship, the wives must make their husbands feel loved by admiring and trusting them. Although it is entirely true that no two individuals will have the same preferences, your husband would still like to know that you’re on his side. It becomes essential to value and ensure he knows about what he values. Example: Many times, if women disagree with their husbands, they start to pinpoint their faults. Thus, they often publicly make fun of their husbands and complain about how their husbands don’t have time for them. Women should realize that all this wouldn’t create a feeling of affection.
- Peace/Space
It is known that men and women are socialized in different manners. Thus, their requirements in life are also other. Men are more likely to seek space, and women are most likely to be around people. Thus, giving their husband “Me” time is essential. Men need a calm atmosphere and a place to unwind. Constant complaining and nagging will push them away. Men will retaliate by ignoring their wives. Without a peaceful environment, they will feel like their needs are not being met, and the relationship will most likely fall. Example: Always nagging about what sort of movies and shows your husband likes to watch; can make him feel annoyed.
Dr Nisha Khanna as a Relationship Counsellor/Marriage Counsellor, proffers online, telephonically and face-to-face Counselling Services. If you are in Delhi, India or any other part of the World, you can approach us through any of these mediums. For further details, visit Bye Tense, or call us at +91-9818211474