This is a classic case where a couple visited our clinic due to infrequent arguments and Counselling for maintaining self and family conflicts. The couple Ria and Rakesh had a arrange marriage of 17 years and had 2 kids out of the wedlock. One is 10 another is 15 years old. Both belong to upper-middle-class families and both families knew each other before some known relative. Ria is a homemaker and Rakesh is a professional.
During the individual counselling sessions with Ria, we got to know that Ria has 2 more sisters in the family. She had a born n brought in the open-minded family. After completing an MBA, she got a job through campus recruitment. She used to work full time in some office as an HR before marriage. During the individual counselling sessions of Rakesh, we found he is the elder son of the family and has one younger sister who is married and lives in Dubai. After completing his CA, Rakesh started his own practice. He is a very hardworking and highly intellectual person. He is workaholic and now well settled in his profession.
Initial months after marriage was very smooth, Ria was working too. The problem started when Ria got pregnant and due to some complications in the pregnancy, she left the job. Ria was a highly ambitious and career-oriented girl. They initially lived with in-laws but due to the transferable Govt. job of Rakesh’s Dad, they are living in a nuclear family from the last 15 years.
We got to know during Counselling Sessions that during the pregnancy, Ria developed slip disc issues n from that onwards she is at home. Rakesh got busy in his professional life. He used to be busy in the office morning till evening. Due to Audits, he has to go sometimes out of the city too. She has to manage kids alone along with the help of domestic staff and nannies. She developed a lot of frustration as her whole life was revolving around the kids and home.
Before Marriage, she never thought of becoming a housewife. As Rakesh was quite occupied in his professional life that he was unable to spend quantity of time with her and kids. Ria became unorganized, even unable to take care of physical and emotional health. Ria was from Mumbai so her parents were unable to help her.
Ria used to complain n crib whenever she and Rakesh used to spend time together. Due to this behaviour of Ria, Rakesh started avoiding her n spending more time at the workplace. Their interaction became limited with the time being esp. only need-based. Except this whenever they talked, they have severe disagreements and fights.
During the Individual and Conjoint Counselling Sessions, we made Ria realized that her whole life moves around Rakesh, kids n home only. She gave up all her ambitions n dreams a long time back. Through Counselling, we helped her to have a disciplined lifestyle and made her learn to understand the importance of self were taking care of her physical, emotional n social well being should be her first priority n suggested her to revive her social circle. We explained Ria also the importance of Appreciation, Gratitude and Positive Communication and esp. Listening. We guided Rakesh to be empathetic towards her n be in touch during day time n spend quality time with her n kids on a regular basis. We also taught them Conflict Resolution Techniques for resolution of problems. We told Rakesh to boost n support her for starting a career again. Now after 7-12 sessions of counselling, both are living happily.
Dr Nisha Khanna as a Marriage Counsellor/Family Counsellor proffers online, telephonically and face to face Counselling Services. If you are living in Delhi, India or any other part of the World, you can approach us through any of these mediums. For further details visit Bye Tense, or call us at +91-9312730331