Many times response and reaction are considered to be synonyms but that’s not true. Although people believe that difference might be small, the effect it has on our lives and relationships is very significant.

A reaction is automated and instant. It comes out of past conditioning which most of the time is mechanical. Thus, memory plays an important role in this interaction and knowledge. It is always poor in a fresh and new situation. Reaction neither changes the situation nor it changes you and most of the time ultimately you will be an utter failure. On the other hand, a response is from moment to moment and is non-mechanical. When a person responds they, see the situation with clarity. Such individuals tend to be clean, clear, serene and silent. A response is an action that an individual has never done before. The beauty of response is that it suits the situation and it is a joy to know it leads to spontaneity. A person doesn’t have to learn response; it comes out of its own accord. It is non- mechanical and comes out of the person’s presence, awareness and consciousness. So, in response, an individual simply follows his/her awareness level. It tends to function as a mirror as it reflects the situation. A response is not related to memory or past experiences of similar situations. Rather response is about repeating past but acting fresh and new in every situation.

If a person responds with awareness then whatever response the persons give it is most of the time right. When you lose your awareness then you react and whatever you do turns out to be wrong. So response comes from oneself whereas reaction is created by another person. An unconscious person reacts whereas a wise person is able to simply observe the emotions as they arise rather than acting on them mechanically.

A response is not instant and comes slowly. It is considered to function more on the moral basis as it takes into account the well-being of other individual and also looks at the long-term effects. It is essential for individuals to learn how to respond to situations rather than how to react. This can help people to build a better relationship and also can learn the art of communication. Rather than reacting, the person should listen carefully first and then respond.

 We often react without thinking and it is more defensive. It’s a gut reaction, often based on fear and insecurities, and it’s not the most balanced or suitable way to act. Responding is taking the situation in, and deciding the best course of action based on values. In reaction, emotions tend to stir up feelings in an individual leading an individual to react. Well in response emotions do not play a major role rather individuals tend to follow logic and reason.

It takes years to learn to respond rather than to react. Learning this is an art and can take years but it has a positive effect in life. The responsive mode of your brain can be activated, encouraged, and reinforced through practices such as regress workout, brainstorming sessions, mindfulness and meditation. We all experience plenty of negative situations. The answer is to be prepared to consciously respond to these negative inputs.  Choosing to respond instead of reacting helps we to demonstrate reliable reactions which increases predictability for others and reduces stress when they interact with us.

Dr. Nisha Khanna as a Relationship Counsellor proffers online, telephonically and face to face Counselling Services. If you are living in Delhi, India or any other part of World, you can approach us through any of these mediums. For further details visit Bye Tense