The story that I will be discussing today could be relayed to most of us. This is about a businessman Raja and his life. He is very successful professionally but was unhappy in personal life so along with his wife, he decided to visit our clinic. He is very peace-loving, naive, sensitive, introvert and silent on the other hand Sakshi his better half is very demanding, dominating, astute and assertive and she is clear what she wants and can go to any extent to get that.

During Couple Counselling, we got to know that Raja and Sakshi knew each other from childhood, and had silent mutual liking since school. In college, they confessed and started dating. Now they have completed 23 years of marriage. Initially, his family was not happy with his decision of marrying her. As per them, she won’t be able to adjust in the family. Still, they got married and the couple was blessed with a baby girl after a few years. Throughout their usual fights, she mostly argues and screams over him and in-laws on small issues. Due to her temperament, he became workaholic and used to make excuses to stay out and avoid fights. She got disturbed because of his inattentive behaviour. After regular reminders from her side, he didn’t change.

Further in Couple Counselling Sessions, he disclosed that she got distracted in initial years of marriage and had small flings in and off which was ignored by him. After a decade she had a serious affair with a boy living nearby and started spending more time over the phone. One day he caught her red-handed, when confronted she apologised and later he forgave her but got disheartened. After a few weeks, she eloped with the same boy and left him all alone with daughter and parents. People of surroundings harassed and mocked which made him emotionally weak.

After one year she came back but was pregnant. His parents again warned him not to accept her but for the sake of society and daughter’s future; he accepted her back in life. A few days later she delivered a baby boy. Everything was going smooth for the next few years but his unhappiness was still intact and remained confined.

Before counselling, he was unaware of his emotional needs and foresight. He has extremely poor decision-making skills and lacks self n social management. In the course of Individual Sessions, we made him realised that you need to be strong enough and stop investing too much in a relationship. Life is about given and take. Like a breath in and breath out; it is a two-way street.  You not only have to give but take also. We told him to put himself on a priority list, take a stand for you and start saying no to others. Stop going out of your comfort zone and be assertive.

After a few Sessions of Counselling, he realised his Self Worth and stopped bothering about his wife and focused on himself.  Now he is very happy, daughter is about to finish the MBA and son is in 10th and flourishing in life. Presently his EQ showed marked improvement n he feels grateful, satisfied and content.

Dr Nisha Khanna as a Psychologist/Marriage Counsellor proffers online, telephonically and face to face Counselling Services. If you are living in Delhi, India or any other part of the World, you can approach us through any of these mediums. For further details visit Bye Tense, or call us at +91-9312730331